Bachelor and bachelorette parties may be synonymous with wild debauchery, signaling the end of singledom with outrageous antics nobody dares remember the next morning. But now that most Americans are getting married later than their parents’ generation, the reality is more: Been there, done that.
“People are shifting away from that narrative of, this is your last days as a single person,” says New York-based event planner Dawn Mauberret. Prenuptial gatherings are less and less focused on booze-filled escapades and more about escaping the pressures of modern life, with a trip centered around food and wellness activities. “It’s more about spending quality time with friends and family.”
Consider the data: The average age for a first marriage in 2018 was 27.8 years for women and 29.8 years for men, according to the most recent estimates from the U.S. Census Bureau. In comparison, the average age was 23.9 years and 26.1 years, respectively, in 1990.
That means most bachelors and bachelorettes have had the majority of their 20s to explore their wild sides if they wanted to. (Some don’t; studies show millennials are spending less on alcohol than previous generations.) With age comes maturity, and with maturity generally comes money, and today’s bachelor and bachelorettes want to step it up a notch—whatever that means to them.
More Luxury, Longer Trips
Litty Samuel, a 33-year-old executive producer at Meredith Corp. in New York, opted for a four-day international getaway for her bachelorette trip in November 2017. She and six friends visited Iceland, where they lounged in the famed Blue Lagoon, hiked to hot springs, and scuba-dived between tectonic plates.
“As I grew older, I partied less and less,” she says. “The more I thought about it, I didn’t know if I want to put on a little dress and go out and wear a bunch of plastic penises around my neck. If I could get a group of girlfriends together, I wanted to hike and experience nature with them instead.”
Jenna Miller, creative director at wedding website Here Comes the Guide, says she’s seeing an uptick in the use of bespoke luxury planning services such as Bach to Basics or Luxury Bachelorette. These couples are using private jets with personal chefs to take their parties to the destinations, which may include the Saguaro Palm Springs, with its pool parties, in-house spa, and daily yoga classes, and Carneros Resort and Spa or Solage Calistoga for wine tasting.
“It’s more sophisticated than a Las Vegas pool party,” she says. “It’s more chic and kind of more adult to go to Napa and do your spa treatment.”
It’s also pricier.
The average bachelor or bachelorette party attendee spends $537, including the cost of travel, accommodations, and gifts. And it’s even more for a luxury getaway; a destination party in New York City could cost guests more than $1,900. (About 35% of millennials have gone into debt to attend a bachelor or bachelorette party, according to a survey by Credit Karma.)